Motherhood Life

Ovarian cysts and pregnancy occurring together can cause many women to feel extremely alarmed. It is worth remembering that cysts are common during pregnancy. Many pregnant women just have to come in terms with it and learn to live with both - ovarian cysts and pregnancy. It is difficult to feel relaxed when a woman is faced with pregnancy and ovarian cysts simultaneously. But a feeling of tension and stress, originating from worrying about it, will only do more harm than good for the expecting mother and the unborn child. As such it is advisable to stop worrying and seek treatment promptly. Pregnancy in itself is a demanding situation and the presence of ovarian cysts only makes it more complicated. The need of the hour for a pregnant woman with ovarian cysts, therefore, is to expedite recovery by understanding the nature of the cysts and seeking proper treatment.

Complications of ovarian cysts

Ovarian cysts occurring during pregnancy can be either of benign or malignant. Benign cysts pose minimal threat during pregnancy and are often ignored. On the other hand, malignant ovarian cysts carry a lot of risk and pose a grave threat in the pregnancy stage. The first step, therefore, is to correctly determine the actual nature of the cysts that you have. It is mainly on the basis of the nature of the cysts, and the extent and severity of the condition, that the treatment plan will be determined. Although some cysts often get cured without any medical or surgical intervention, most other types need a proper treatment plan. It is critical to monitor the ovarian cysts carefully to avoid possible complications like ovarian cysts rupture during pregnancy. In spite of regular monitoring, complications can arise suddenly. Even if you have been diagnosed with benign cysts, take extra care during pregnancy and stay safe.

Let’s face it, ovarian cysts and pregnancy are a potentially dangerous combination. It requires urgent medical attention and should not be ignored. Ovarian cysts have been known to be responsible for complications in pregnancy, including miscarriages. Larger cysts give rise to even bigger and more serious problems. Consult with your doctor and initiate the best form of treatment without delay. This will ensure that you have a healthy and trouble-free pregnancy. There are many excellent treatment options available today.

Treatment

Ovarian cysts during pregnancy need a different course of treatment than during normal times. Some of the drugs and medication used during normal times may be considered dangerous for the unborn child. The pregnant patient is therefore strongly advised to refrain from buying over the counter drugs, especially painkillers. Some of the other conventional options may also not be available. The state of pregnancy will preclude many of the usual measures adopted by conventional medical treatment. Ovarian cysts surgery is such impossibility during this time. Hence, it is always advisable to look at alternative natural forms of treatment that can help cure ovarian cysts during pregnancy, without the usual hazards of conventional mainstream treatment. One of the best means to address the problem is by taking recourse to the holistic approach. Due to its intrinsic safe nature, holistic approach can prove to be extremely beneficial in treating ovarian cysts while posing no threat to the pregnancy. Other advantages include:

• Holistic approach is one of the safest and most benign modes of treatment that a pregnant woman can adopt. It can be started during any phase of pregnancy and the patient can always rest assured knowing that it will pose no danger for her or the unborn child.

• Holistic approach addresses the problem at the grass root level and this ensures that the problem does not recur again in the future. This is where holistic approach scores over conventional medical treatment which aims to cure only the symptoms without eradicating the root of the problem. This leaves the patient vulnerable for future attacks and there is always a risk that the condition will appear again later. Holistic approach not only provides relief from ovarian cysts during pregnancy. It goes much further than that and actually roots out the problem for good.

• Holistic approach makes extensive use of natural techniques that are very efficient and incredibly effective, yet mild and benign for the human body. This marks a sharp departure from the aggressive techniques and harsh medication used in conventional forms of treatment. The multidimensional nature of holistic approach lets it explore many different avenues of treatment, instead of remaining stuck with one dogma. This ensures a roaring success eventually.

• Further complications that may arise during pregnancy are effectively avoided by adopting the holistic approach. Ovarian cysts may rupture and lead to rapid deterioration of the condition. Holistic approach helps one overcome these threats by keeping the condition under control and preventing it from developing complications. This ultimately ensures a safe and uneventful pregnancy even if a woman has ovarian cysts.

Holistic approach also helps at an emotional level and can help relieve stress and anxiety that are usually experienced by most women during pregnancy. The holistic practitioner often acts as a counselor who can help put your fears to rest, relieve your tension, lower your stress levels and clear your doubts. You will be amazed to find a whole new degree of confidence and vigor that will enable you to enjoy your pregnancy while getting your ovarian cysts cured simultaneously.

Your chosen holistic practitioner will advise you on the best course of action to treat your specific case of ovarian cysts and pregnancy. Don’t delay if you are pregnant and you know to have ovarian cysts? Start a treatment today to avoid further risks and head for complete recovery quickly.

“I think they got together for physical reasons,” my friend says, discussing the marriage of a mutual acquaintance. “You know,” she whispers, cupping a hand around her mouth. “SEX.”

Instinctively, I glance around. The children are halfway down the block, in happy pursuit of the ice cream truck. We are, for all intents and purposes, two grown women alone.

Why are we whispering?

After nearly 37 years on the planet, two children and eight years of marriage, I believe I’ve earned the right to say the word *** out loud. Just like I believe that, on occasion, there is simply no substitute for a four-letter word. Not only have I learned that you can be a mother and still retain your identity as a woman, but I believe it is essential.

To be clear, I’m not talking about “letting it all hang out” - that repugnantly self-obsessed hedonism masquerading as honesty familiar to anyone who has ever watched a daytime talk show.

I am talking about not relinquishing your self to your role as mother, and not falling into the trap of believing that a good mother is one who lives her life above reproach. You see them everywhere. Women with their sexless bobs and pressed shirts, their flawless makeup and sensible shoes corralling children through parks and restaurants, struggling to keep the tension out of their perfectly modulated voices. Women who have sanitized their personalities to within an inch of their life, until they are as edgy as a G-rated movie. These are women who have forgotten what it is like to ride a bike without a helmet, or walk alone through their neighborhood on a summer night. Without shoes. Clutching a glass of wine. They’ve forgotten because they are Mom now. And Mom doesn’t do those kind of things anymore.

It is not that I find motherhood oppressive. Rather, it feels liberating, as though my most authentic self was born the day my first child came into the world. But sometimes the culture of motherhood is oppressive. Because the truth is, it is not my children who expect me to tow the imaginary line. It is the other mothers.

I remember being at a birthday party last year for a friend of my daughter’s, a little boy who was turning six. It was a perfectly pleasant party - a refreshingly low-budget affair at a neighborhood park, and I was (gasp!) actually sort of enjoying myself. At least until I tuned into the conversation going on across the table. Two mothers were discussing the imminent release of “The Simpsons Movie,” and it was clear from their tone that both of them were vehemently opposed to seeing the movie. Let me be clear - they were not discussing whether it was appropriate viewing for their young children, they were talking about whether they should see it themselves.

“I heard there is a scene where Bart appears naked,” one said, with clear disapproval in her voice.

I’d heard this too, and as a fan of the show I thought it sounded like a riot. But I realize humor is, by and large, a personal thing. But that’s the thing. These women weren’t objecting to the humor, they were objecting to the idea of a cartoon character appearing *****. It was, as the other mother said, in very poor taste.

“I don’t think the world needs to see Bart’s wee-wee.”

It is hard to imagine that the sight of an animated “wee-wee” could possibly be shocking to women who have borne children. Harder still to imagine conjuring up actual indignation over such a thing - or reaching your mid-40’s without being able to laugh at yourself.

What I’ve found is that, however rigid other mothers can be, my children are much more forgiving. Most of the time, I am allowed to be “me” and not just “Mom.” Or maybe it is just that I’ve chosen to live where the two intersect - a place where Me and Mom are interchangeable.Because for my children, Mom is a woman who tends to their needs, but also has dreams and desires, lazy days and happy days, days where things feel a little too small and the only antidote is to take my own brightest self and color outside the lines a little. Because I’ve come to realize that it is not my job to shield my kids from the world - it is my job to reveal it to them. To stand at the shore with my children securely at my side, pointing out both the wonders and the dangers of the sea in the way only a person can when she has spent a lifetime navigating its waters.

Posted by River at 4:46 PM

Becoming a mother for the first time is a daunting experience for any woman, but there is copious help available for mothers to be to turn to. Whether you are looking to talk to someone about this impending life changing happening or to find out information on the internet, the amount of help that can be found is extensive and generally very useful indeed.

Let’s look at a few of the common fears mothers to be harbour, and what the truth is.

1: Will the baby like me?

The simple answer is yes, it will, and the reasons are easy to explain. Motherhood is a natural step in a woman, and has evolved through the ages as we have. The bond between mother and baby is formed in the first days of the youngster’s life, and this is the most important time of the process. This is entirely natural - there is nothing the mother needs to do other than what will seem right and logical, and very soon the baby will treat the mother as his closest confidante. This is a worry that can be dispelled very quickly, as the bond will be felt and formed very quickly indeed.

2: How do I hold a baby?

This is a very common worry and one that comes with the fear of not giving security to a newborn. Again, the knack to holding a baby will come naturally after the first few times, and it will feel entirely comfortable and normal before you even think about it. Babies need to be comforted and enclosed in order to feel protected, and the natural way in which we swaddle a newborn in blankets and hold them close to us is an extension of the comfort of the womb. Keeping a baby securely surrounded and firmly held is just a natural response that will come naturally.

3: How will I know when baby wants feeding?

Babies have not acquired the power of speech yet they can communicate. It will become obvious to you when a baby needs feeding, and not just from its timely cries but as it will be at regular intervals. Babies don’t just cry when they are distressed, but as a way of ‘talking’ to the mother - it is the sound they are equipped with and is used a great deal in the early stages of development.

4: Will my baby sleep well?

This is a question that can not be answered as each and every baby is different. Some will sleep for long periods during the night and day, and others for only short stints. It is advisable to try and ‘teach’ the baby to sleep at set times, thus getting both child and the rest of the family into a set routine that will enable everyone to sleep for decent periods of time - especially mother! It is not necessarily a sign of a problem if baby does not sleep regularly as it may be that your baby is simply one who does not sleep regularly.

5: Will I have everything I need?

This is a worry that many mothers to be have and one that is also inspired by not being able to care for the baby to the best of their intentions. There are many websites and ebooks that will guide you towards making sure you have everything you need to make both your and baby’s lives as comfortable and suitable as possible. A good tip is to read all the information that you can and make a lost of what you will need, and then tick off each one as you purchase it.

Having a baby is a daunting prospect yet it also promises to be the most exciting and life changing time in a young woman’s life, let alone the rest of the family. Follow the advice you are given and consult books and experts and being a mother need not be a concern, just a thing of joy.

 

The transition to motherhood is a profound step in a woman’s life. Becoming a mother is a life-changing experience and motherhood is a lifelong role. Although motherhood is universal in many aspects, the transition into it is very individualized. Our past childhood relationships with our mothers, our fathers and the overall connection we experienced in our parents’ marriages form the backdrop for our emotional readiness for motherhood. Therefore, individualized preparation and care is far more effective when it deals with a woman’s specific “birth inventory,” which is a profile of her significant fears and concerns about upcoming motherhood and childbirth.

If you are a new mom who is struggling with the life changes of new motherhood, trying to take care of your new baby, feeling sleep deprived, and overwhelmed with your new responsibilities, your patience and tolerance will be stretched thin. Many women do not seek treatment because of the shame or guilt they feel about not enjoying motherhood at a time when there is tremendous societal and familial pressure to be a “perfect mother.

Although a natural and healthy part of human life, becoming a mother is hard work and it takes every nook, cranny and crevice of a woman’s being. We now know how both physical and psychological health are profoundly impacted by everything from stress to being in love, from positive and negative attitudes, from fear to gratitude.

Pregnancy is a time of many questions about pregnancy symptoms, weight gain, what’s safe to eat while pregnant, prenatal tests, labor and delivery, and more. With increasing rates of obesity in the United States, postpartum weight retention is an important factor to consider when assessing maternal health and pregnancy outcome. Mothers may suffer “maternal depletion syndrome,” which refers to the combination of depression, low libido, excess weight and fatigue that can accompany motherhood. Don’t be surprised if it takes nine months to a year to regain your pre-pregnancy weight.

Women who have healthy babies gain varying amounts of weight during pregnancy. If you are at a desirable weight for your body size before you become pregnant, a weight gain of 24 to 27 pounds is recommended. If you are approximately 20 pounds or more above your desirable weight before pregnancy, a weight gain of 24 pounds is recommended. The average weight gain during pregnancy is between 25 to 35 pounds. The weight that you gain is a rough indication of how much nutrition is available to the fetus for growth. If a woman has 10 extra pounds, then taking two months to lose that weight is absolutely normal.

Believing that after giving birth the pre-pregnancy shape and weight will return immediately is a sure way to become frustrated. Most women will gain weight appropriately during pregnancy if they follow a healthy eating pattern according to Canada’s Food Guide to Healthy Eating, maintain an active lifestyle and allow their appetite to guide their energy intake. But various medical conditions during pregnancy such as gestational diabetes and hypertension can add an additional 10 to 15 pounds to a pregnancy weight leaving more postpartum weight for Mom to lose. Many women mourn their inability to lose the weight, but the reasons behind these unsuccessful attempts are sometimes no fault of the women. Women whose gestational gain exceeds the recommended range are more likely to retain weight at one year postpartum than are women with gains within the recommended range.

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Becoming a mother is a profound step in a woman’s life. Becoming a mother is a life-changing experience and motherhood is a lifelong role. Although motherhood is universal in many aspects, the transition into it is very individualized. Our past childhood relationships with our mothers, our fathers and the overall connection we experienced in our parents’ marriages form the backdrop for our emotional readiness for motherhood. Therefore, individualized preparation and care is far more effective when it deals with a woman’s specific “birth inventory,” which is a profile of her significant fears and concerns about upcoming motherhood and childbirth.

If you are a new mom who is struggling with the life changes of new motherhood, trying to take care of your new baby, feeling sleep deprived, and overwhelmed with your new responsibilities, your patience and tolerance will be stretched thin. Many women do not seek treatment because of the shame or guilt they feel about not enjoying motherhood at a time when there is tremendous societal and familial pressure to be a “perfect mother”.

Pregnancy is a time of many questions about pregnancy symptoms, weight gain, what’s safe to eat while pregnant, prenatal tests, labor and delivery, and more. With increasing rates of obesity in the United States, postpartum weight retention is an important factor to consider when assessing maternal health and pregnancy outcome. Mothers may suffer “maternal depletion syndrome,” which refers to the combination of depression, low libido, excess weight and fatigue that can accompany motherhood. Don’t be surprised if it takes nine months to a year to regain your pre-pregnancy weight.

Women who have healthy babies gain varying amounts of weight during pregnancy. If you are at a desirable weight for your body size before you become pregnant, a weight gain of 24 to 27 pounds is recommended. If you are approximately 20 pounds or more above your desirable weight before pregnancy, a weight gain of 24 pounds is recommended. The average weight gain during pregnancy is between 25 to 35 pounds. The weight that you gain is a rough indication of how much nutrition is available to the fetus for growth. If a woman has 10 extra pounds, then taking two months to lose that weight is absolutely normal.

Believing that after giving birth the pre-pregnancy shape and weight will return immediately is a sure way to become frustrated. Most women will gain weight appropriately during pregnancy if they follow a healthy eating pattern according to Canada’s Food Guide to Healthy Eating, maintain an active lifestyle and allow their appetite to guide their energy intake. But various medical conditions during pregnancy such as gestational diabetes and hypertension can add an additional 10 to 15 pounds to a pregnancy weight leaving more postpartum weight for Mom to lose. Many women mourn their inability to lose the weight, but the reasons behind these unsuccessful attempts are sometimes no fault of the women. Women whose gestational gain exceeds the recommended range are more likely to retain weight at one year postpartum than are women with gains within the recommended range.

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It’s so easy to fall in love, it’s so easy to fall in love, its so easy . . . . Love me or leave me, don’t let me be lonely, I want your love and I want your love only . . . Why then, are there so many lonely married people around?

Today’s songs are more realistic, I think. Less romantic. The truth of the matter is that people don’t always experience the same kind of love. Some are in it for the sex, some romance and some to feel they have someone who will stay with them for a while. Today’s love songs revel in the sexual, there’s hardly any attempt to conceal their meaning. Perhaps that is why so many young people get together because of sexual attraction, or, as many young girls attest, “I just wanted to be a Mum”.

Is that because by being a Mum they feel sure that someone will be there to love them when the relationship goes wrong? Perhaps. Maybe they just need someone to need them. Such is the price we pay for independence, the materialism that is every person’s right, and the need to survive in an uncertain world, or all three at once. The three prongs of the fork that drives mothers out to work also robs their children of the nurturing and support that leads to the development of confidence, a feeling of being cared for and plain, honest undivided attention. They feel supported from behind and therefore more able to put tendrils out into the world and learn how it works before running headlong towards independence for which they are ill prepared.

Truth be told, we don’t pay the price either. It is our children, those sad teenage single parents, who will only too often pay the price. Not at first, not now, but sometime in the future when their dependant child (or children) wants independence of their own, leaving their mother lonely. Once premature middle age or alcohol and drug fired ill health robs them of their ‘comfortable years’, they will surely pay the price.

Passionate infatuation gives way, over time, to humdrum, even a dislike of the other party. They build their relationships on clay, without developing firm foundations based on friendship and respect. Instead of the promise of good things to come, many married people complain of feeling alone. These days each person in the marriage expects to enjoy their own career, a share in bringing up the children and equal rights over making decisions. Traditional roles (I am not supporting them or voicing dissent against them) are often shattered in an attempt to find a new way to live together.

There are uncertainties, confused roles, demands and expectations that weren’t seen so frequently previously, so it is no wonder that couples struggle somewhat against each other rather than pulling together as a partnership of differing roles. As time goes by, instead of bonding and binding together, each married partner tries to get on with life as best they can, trying to keep each other happy and yet lead their own life too. It is hard to exist under such a strain.

After years of listening to people’s problems and offering solutions, certain patterns are appearing. The first struggle seems to be around the first pregnancy, when inexperienced girls have to cope with so much information, so much caring from the medical profession, expectations that husbands or partners will be involved and so much pressure to ‘have a natural birth’ that they feel shame and inadequacy at the first signs that things might not pan out the way ‘it should be’. They have so many doubts and fears about a safe and painless birth that they are afraid to express in case they are laughed at or put down with a casual “Just practice breathing and everything will be alright”. Nobody tells them that it is bloody well going to hurt, and they are better off getting some help when the urge to push gets too strong. I don’t know whether any ever tells first time mothers about post natal depression and how to overcome it, what the solutions are, what to do if you feel damn miserable or apathetic and how to deal with the guilt and anger, but I get to deal with the aftermath. Can’t anyone in the medical profession prepare these young women for the reality as well as the romance of childbirth. Motherhood is not all about buying nice things and playing Mum and Dad as people often think today.

And what about the men? Does anyone prepare them for the feelings about wanting to walk away from the responsibility of it, the helplessness they feel inside, the fear that they might accidentally hurt their small baby? How are they prepared for the feeling of being left out, of loosing the attention of, and *** with their partner? Why don’t we talk about this in school and prepare our teenage kids for what is to come.

The next danger time comes when the young parents are struggling to make ends meet. He is desperate to build up a career of some kind in order to protect and nurture his family. He puts in extra hours and, with less sleep, feels distinctly weary. When he comes home the kids are playing up and he doesn’t get time to unwind before he is thrust into the bosom of his family, nerves awry and jangling. Or, he returns home late, the kids are already tucked up in bed, the wife is ironing or flopped out in front of the tele totally exhausted. What kind of life is this, he wonders, “This is not how it was meant to be”.

He thinks that his wife has lost that look he fell for. She no longer has the energy to change and get made up before he comes home from work, and anyhow, she never knows what time he is going to return. She thinks he has become moody, difficult and unresponsive. They both feel lonely and uncared for.

Danger point three comes later, when each have found their own solution to their disappointment. Either they have made separate friends and other interests in order to fill the gap in their relationship, or she has buried herself in her children, mother’s mornings and shopping and he buries himself in his work, his mates and ‘going down the pub’. She might be going out to work, rushing home and picking up the kids from minders, cooking dinner or picking up a take-away meal and trying to cram a bit of housework into the evening before slumping exhausted into bed. Either way, it is still far from the promise of a romantic life together and a happy family existence.

It is no wonder that so many married couples drink a lot. But this is no solution to their lonely lives. The glowing happy laughing alcohol infused faces mask the sadness they both feel inside. The alcohol acts as a depressant anyway, doing untold damage to their bodies and robbing them of years off their lives.

I see so much damage, it is difficult for me to stand by and observe without comment. With a bit of education and the patience to learn about the reality of adulthood, young people would be better equipped to deal with the demands of love and marriage and parenthood. Why is it necessary to wait until it is too late to prevent such sadness and pain? Why does the state not put together a programme of life skills to be taught in schools that include how to relate to people, how to deal with life issues and to prepare couples for living together happily and sharing their lives with their families. They need to be given the tools to be able to work through the difficulties that they will face together. They need to feel supported by the state, not live in fear and loneliness, hoping that they will survive, and that their relationship will endure without their partner finding solace in the arms of another, wrecking the family in the process.

The harsh realities of personal relationships should be discussed and support skills provided for all school children. They will end up having happier, more fulfilled lives as a consequence, and being less of a burden on the state too. It is an economical and necessary exercise that could bring benefits all round.

The wisdom of Kabbalah tells us that every action a person makes is only to further a personal desire. While there are many different types of desires, they are all an effort to obtain pleasure. Actions taken to avoid suffering are really just the inverse aspect of seeking pleasure.

Once a desire surfaces, our intellect starts figuring out how to fulfill it. Next, we decide whether the anticipated pleasure is worth the work required to get it.  If the answer is “yes,” then we act.  If not, then we do nothing. Most of the time, we are completely unaware of this process. There are exceptions, though.

Imagine that you are lying in bed early on a Saturday morning. You wake up feeling slightly hungry. Your bed is nice and warm, the floor is cold, and you’re not ready to face the demands of the day.  You go back to sleep.  A couple of hours later, you wake up again to the smell of fresh coffee.  You are now ravenous. The pleasure promised by coffee and breakfast is now great enough to cause you to jump out of bed.

Kabbalah tells us that we perform this type of calculation literally thousands of times every day. In fact, we do not move a muscle without first having a desire and performing a calculation based on that desire. Even an action as simple as scratching our nose is first motivated by a desire to stop the itch. If the itch is just a little tickle and we are absorbed in other work, we might ignore it for a while, but eventually the anticipated pleasure from stopping that tickle will win out. We scratch the itch without even thinking about it.

So our actions are all initiated by desires, but what about our thoughts? There is an erroneous belief that a person’s mind can rise above his desires, but in fact, the mind is totally driven and limited by our desires. Why do we think about something? Because we first have a desire for it!

I have a desire to eat, so my mind starts thinking about what to eat, how to get it, who I last had dinner with, the best restaurants in town, and all sorts of other things that are directly or indirectly associated with the desire for food. I go through a similar process if I have a desire for knowledge, or for respect from my peers. Each thought can be traced back to a desire that started the chain of thoughts.

But surely we have all used our minds to override a desire, haven’t we? In reality, no. Let’s take a very powerful desire – the desire for chocolate! The anticipated pleasure from the chocolate is great, but we use our “will power” to override that desire. But where did that will power originate? From a desire to be healthy, or to lose weight, or to appear strong by demonstrating our ability to resist the chocolate. So we only replaced one desire with a different, stronger desire.  If the second desire had not been stronger, we would have devoured the chocolate! Once again, the desire rules.

According to the wisdom of Kabbalah, we are all born with “uncorrected” desires, meaning that our motivation is to receive pleasure for ourselves. This is obvious in many cases, but it can also be extremely subtle. People often claim that acts of charity or extreme sacrifice are examples of altruism. It is hard to admit, but if we are brutally honest, we get something out of the deal every single time. It might be as simple as a sense of satisfaction for supporting a just cause. Acting in accordance with moral or ethical tenets also provides a sense of pleasure. The ability to be “right” is another sneaky payback, even if it is associated with negative consequences (“See – I knew she would fail and I would have to pick up the pieces!”) As any psychologist can attest, human motivations can be very complex. But in every case, the person achieves some real or perceived benefit from every action. 

A quick look at the headlines shows us the results of humankind operating based on uncorrected desires.  But if we have no control over our desires, and those desires dictate all of our thoughts and actions, then what choice do we have?

Kabbalah tells us that we need to transform our desires so that our basic motivation is for others. Then our desires are said to be “corrected.”  The closest we have to an example of corrected desires is a mother’s love in so far as she is motivated by the good of her child.  When her child feels good, she feels good. Even if she is starving, any food she has will go to the child. This is a natural property of motherhood, but our challenge is to be similarly motivated by the good of our fellow man. 

Kabbalah provides us with the methodology to correct our desires. To the extent that we can accomplish this transformation, so our minds and actions will also change. By changing our actions, we can change the world.

Consider this: motherhood is perhaps the most difficult, exhausting, demanding job in the world. Yet for all that, it is a job that is too often taken for granted. Mothers Day is an opportunity for all of us to show our gratitude and appreciation for the woman who brought us into the world, who bandaged our cuts, held us when we were frightened, and even gave us a smack on the rear when we got out of line. There are all kinds of Mothers Day gifts we can present to this lady whom we can never fully repay but whatever that gift turns out to be, it should something that both reflects the personality of the giver and the tastes of the recipient. After all, who knows your mother like you? And who knows you better than your mother?

One Mothers Day gift that is sure to please is the gift of gourmet chocolate. This ancient gift from the Mayan civilization of southern Mexico and Guatemala is not only tasty, the consumption of it releases endorphins in the brain pleasure-producing chemicals and provides anti-oxidants and other health benefits as well. If she appreciates a good cup of afternoon tea, perhaps a special tea pot and a customized cup, along with a collection of exotic teas from around the world is in order. If your mother has been drinking plain pekoe-and-pekoe from a cardboard box all her life, Mothers Day may be just the time to introduce her to the wonders of Earl Grey, Oolong, Jasmine and that spicy East Indian blend, Chai.

Theme-based gifts are another was to go. What are Moms interests? Is it cross-stitching or needlepoint, or something more adventurous like biking or tennis? If Mom is staying active as she gets older (and thats a good thing to encourage), you might consider one of the mothers day gift baskets that include items relating to her favourite sport. Nothing expresses love more than presenting the mom who bicycles or simply enjoys brisk walks with safety items such as a rear-view mirror and a special reflective vest to make sure shes visible when out and about.

Gift certificates and tickets to an event she may enjoy a concert or a Broadway road production, for example are also welcome on Mothers Day. The great thing about gift certificates is that it shows that you were thoughtful enough to allow her to choose her own unique Mothers Day gifts items you both know shell enjoy. These can be included in a presentation gift basket that is attractive and contains additional items such as those mentioned above. Just remember, whatever you choose to give is not nearly as important as the thought and feeling that goes into it.

Introduction

Most often in a developing country, each minute of every day, a woman dies from complications related to pregnancy. For all women who die, 30 to 50 percent of women suffer from injury, infection, or other complication. Almost 15% complications of these are life-threatening and require immediate obstetric care. Hence, safe motherhood can be achieved by providing high-quality maternal health services to all women during pregnancy, childbirth, and during the postpartum period.

Maternal mortality

Most of the maternal mortality is due to following major medical causes:

1. Severe bleeding (hemorrhage);

2. Infection;

3. Unsafe abortion complications;

4. Hypertensive disorders of pregnancy; and

5. Obstructed labor.

Warning signs during pregnancy:

1. Failure to gain weight (at least 6 kilograms should be gained during pregnancy)

2. Anemia or paleness inside the eyelids (healthy eyelids are red or pink)

3. Unusual swelling of legs, arms or face

4. Movement of fetus being either very little or not at all.

Therefore, a pregnant woman needs to be checked at a clinic or health facility at least four times during every pregnancy. It is also important to seek the advice of a skilled birth attendant (such as a doctor, nurse or midwife), about where the baby should be born. A pregnant woman should also be properly educated so that she can take care of herself and her baby.

Still, a pregnant woman is susceptible to all those possible diseases which a normal human being can encounter. Hence, if there is any disorder during pregnancy, the situation can be best managed under the guidance of good physician.

Considering the above facts, in Ayurveda, Kashyap samhita has given two full chapters on this subject. Harita samhita has enlisted emaciation, nausea, vomiting, edema, fever, anorexia, diarrhea and discoloration etc. According to Sushruta samhita, pregnant women are prone to ****** paralysis. Similarly Charaka samhita and Vagbhata also have suggested that the pressure caused by growing fetus increases in cases of piles and edema.

According to Charaka (C. 1000 B.C.), pregnant woman should be treated with soft, sweet, cold drugs, dietetics and gentle pleasing behaviour. She should not be given emetics and purgatives.

 Exercise and use of pungent drugs should be avoided (Charaka Sutra sthan 25/40).

According to Harita(10-12th Cent. A.D.), unripe fruit of Bilva (Aegle marmelos Corr.) mixed with curd and sugar is always beneficial.

There are certain diseases whose treatment at the initial stage itself prevents them from becoming major disorders at a later stage. Treatments of such diseases are mentioned below:

Line of treatment in different gestational month:

During fourth month of pregnancy:  In this, if woman suffers from any disease of vata, retention of urine, pain etc. then castor oil with milk should be given (Kashyap khil sthan, 10).

During fifth month: Evacuative ***** and nutritive ***** containing sour, salty drug and sweet substance should be given (Kashyap khil sthan, 10).

During sixth month: In case of lymphadenitis, furunculous, inflammation, abscess, use of cauterization and surgery should be done (Kashyap khil sthan, 10).

During seventh month: If there is protuberant flesh then its suppression should be done with help of surgery or cauterization (Kashyap khil sthan, 10).

General disorder during pregnancy and their management:

1. Vomiting:

The vomiting related to pregnancy is classified as simple vomiting of pregnancy (milder type) and Hyperemesis gravidarum(severe type). Slight vomiting is common in early pregnancy (about 50%). It may however, occur at any time in day, generally occurs in morning. It does not produce any impairment of health or restrict the normal activities of women and gets disappeared with or without treatment by 12-14 weeks of pregnancy.

It could be managed by avoiding fatty and spicy foods. Patient is advised to take plenty of fluids (2.5l in 24hr.) and fruit juices.

Hyperemesis gravidarum is severe type of vomiting of pregnancy which has got deleterious effect on the health of the mother in day to day activities. The etiology is obscure but the following are the known facts:

 -It is mostly limited to first trimester.

-It is most common in first pregnancy.

-It has got a familial history.

-It has more prevalence in hydatidiform mole and multiple pregnancies.

-It is more common in vata vaigunya, non-fulfillment of dauhrida stage (i.e. non fulfillment of desired substance by mother during pregnancy)

Management:

To correct the fluids, electrolytes and other metabolic disturbance.

Nutritional support with Vit.B1, B6, Vit.C and Vit.B12.

Nursing care: sympathetic but firm handling of the patient is essential.

Some useful drugs:

Paste of Dhanyaka (Coriandrum sativum Linn.) mixed with rice water and sugar should be given (Yogratnakar, Stri rog chikitsa sthan).

Flour of parched barley mixed with decoction of Sunthi (Zingiber officinale Rosc.) and Bilva (Aegle marmelos Corr.) (Yogratnakar, Stri rog chikitsa sthan ).

.2. Pre-eclamptic toxemia: It is a multi system disorder of unknown etiology characterized by development of hypertension to the extent of 140/90mm Hg or more with proteinuria after the 20th week. It may appear even before 20th week as in case of hydatidiform mole and acute poly hydramnios.

Demonstration of pitting edema over the ankles after 12hr. bed rest, rapid gain in weight of more than 1lb a week or more than 5lb a month of pregnancy may be earliest evidence of pre-Eclampsia.

There is increased association of pre-eclampsia with primigravida, family history, placental abnormalities, genetic disorder and thrombophilias.

Management:  As long as the etiology is obscure the treatment is mostly empirical and symptomatic. Diet should contain adequate amount of protein (about 100gm). Usual salt intake and fluids is not restricted. Total calories approximate 1600 cal/day.

In favorable cases, there is fall of blood pressure and weight with subsidence of edema. Urinary output increases with diminishing proteinuria, if previously present.

In unfavorable cases, the definitive treatment of pre-eclampsia is termination pregnancy through which mother could be saved.

3. Eclampsia:

Pre-eclampsia when complicated with convulsion and /or coma is called as eclampsia. The causes of cerebral irritation leading to convulsion are not clear. The irritation may be provoked by anoxia (spasm of the cerebral vessels following hypertension). Cerebral edema may also contribute to cerebral irritation, arrhythmia which increases following anoxia / edema.

Management:

Patient should be placed in a railed cot in an isolated room.

Anticonvulsant and sedative regime should be used.

4. Fever:

Fever to pregnant women is most troublesome disease and fetus also suffers due to transfer of heat of fever from the mother. If fever occurs before 4th month then patient should be advised to fast for one day, followed by use of drinkables free from fat and salt. She should take only rice gruel followed by cereals with soups and no medicine should be given. Lekhan karma (the measures which makes the body light) could be used if it occurs after 4th month (Kashyap khil sthan,10).

In taruna jwara (recent fever), massage with oil, nasal drops and sternutatory drugs (causing sneezing) should be avoided as they influence the fetus by making it stiff or immobile (Kashyap, khil sthan 10/18).

Similarly emesis produces fetal abnormalities, abortion and other serious disorders (Charka, siddhi sthan 2/9).

General treatment:

Decoction of Chandan (Santalum album Linn.), Sariva (Hemidesmus indicus R.Br.), Lodhra (Symplocos racemosa Roxb.) & mardvika (Vitis vinifera Linn.) mixed with sugar should be given. (Yogratnakar, Stri rog chikitsa sthan).

Hriberadi decoction prescribed for diarrhea is also beneficial (Kashyap, khil sthan.10).

5. Diarrhea during pregnancy:

Dietetic abnormalities, use of ripened fruits and polluted water, fear, grief etc. psychological trauma, emaciation and due to doshas or other body disease can cause diarrhea to anybody. However during pregnancy presence of least abnormalities may produce diarrhea.

Management:

Digestive drugs should be prescribed when diarrhea has sufficient quantity of mucous in ***** and constipation drug should be prescribed incase ***** do not contain mucous.

Kalyanakawaleha and Hriberadi decoction is beneficial in all types of diarrhea (Kashyap, khil sthan.10).

6.  Epilepsy:

In this, incidence of fetal malformation and still birth increases. The malformation includes- cleft lips/palate, mental retardation, cardiac abnormalities, limb defect. There is chance of neonatal hemorrhage. There is also a risk of developing epilepsy to the offspring of an epileptic mother.

Management:

-Vit.K 10mg a day orally is to be given in the last two weeks of pregnancy.

-Juice of lemon mixed with vid and rock salt.

-Decoction of agnimantha (Premna mucronata Roxb.)

-Soups of meat of quail mixed with fat.

7. Jaundice:

When the serum bilirubin level exceeds 2mg % (normal being .2-.8mg %), visible yellow staining of the tissue appear. Its overall incidence in India is 1-4% per 1000 deliveries.

It may be due to severe pre-eclampsia, eclampsia, acute fatty liver (acute yellow atrophy of the liver), severe hyperemesis gravidarum, intra hepatic cholestasis is the second most common cause of jaundice in pregnancy, the first one being the viral infection.

Management:

-Decoction of prsniparni (Uraria picta Desv.), bala (Sida cordifolia Linn.) and vasa (Adhatoda vasica Nees) should be given (Yogratnakar, stri rog chikitsa sthan).

-Use of pippali (Piper longum Linn.) and root of ankotha (Alangium salvifolium Linn.f.) mixed with juice of horse dung and curd of buffalo’s milk is beneficial (Kashyap, chikitsa sthan. 2/6).

8. Heart pain:

In 32nd week of pregnancy the pressure on heart is highest and with time it goes on increasing. In such cases, the patient needs special care.

We may use powdered pippali (Piper longum Linn.) with paste of patra (Digitalis purpurea Linn.), coca ( Coffea arabica Linn.) and priyangu (Callicarpa macrophylla Vahl.) mixed with juice of lemon(Citrus medica Linn.). (Kashyap, khil sthan.10).

9.  Tuberculosis:

The incidence ranges between 1-2% among the hospital deliveries in the tropics, and is predominantly confined to the under privileged sectors of society. Incidence of T.B. is also rising worldwide with the rising prevalence of HIV infected patients, positive family histories etc. Alcohol addiction and intravenous drug abuse are also responsible for this.

Management:

- An electuary made with maricha (Piper nigrum Linn.), bharngi (Clerodendrum serratum Linn.), and pippali (Piper longum Linn.) mixed with lemon juice should be given (Kashyap, khil sthan.10).

- If it is associated with trauma then use of an electuary made with madhuka (Glycyrrhiza glabra Linn.), sankhapushpi (Convolvulus pluricaulis Chois.), jiva (Leptadenia reticulate W. & A.), sugar and honey should be used (Kashyap, khil sthan.10).

- Pippalyadi leha is also useful (Kashyap, khil sthan.10).

10. Anemia:

It is the most common hematological disorder that may occur during pregnancy. According to standard laid down by WHO, anemia in pregnancy is present when the hemoglobin concentration in the peripheral blood is 11gm/100ml or less. During pregnancy, plasma volume expand (maximum around 32nd week) resulting hemoglobin dilution, which result in fall of hemoglobin concentration.

Due to anemia pre-eclampsia, recurrent infections, heart failure at 30-32 week of pregnancy and preterm labor may happen.

General treatment:

1. A realistic balance diet rich in protein and vitamin is prescribed.

2. To improve the appetite and facilitate digestion, some drugs could be given, such as use of powder of pippali, pippalimula (root of Piper longum Linn.), mustak (Cyperus rotundus Linn.) with sweetened milk or honey. (Kashyap, Chitiksa sthan. 2/13)

3. Effective therapy to cure disease contributing to the cause of anemia.

 Special therapy:  The principal is to raise the hemoglobin level to normal as far as possible. Thereafter an attempt is made to restore the iron reserve, before the patient goes in labor.

11. Acute pain in abdomen:

Some amount of abdominal pain is common during pregnancy.  In approximately 80% of women who are pregnant, back pain is present. The etiology of pain is probably related to a combination of mechanical, metabolic, circulatory, and psychosomatic and social contributing factors. The fact that one-third of the patients who experience pain starting during the first trimester when mechanical forces are not a significant force, highly indicates that the most probably cause is due to a change in hormonal influence. Patients are instructed to avoid excessive weight gain; exercise to strengthen the back muscles, maintain correct posture and wear sensible shoes (not high heels).

Pregnancy is one of the most beautiful aspects of womanhood. Each pregnancy, each child born, is a special opportunity for a woman to discover within herself great strength and flexibility. She can discover her great power yet her ability to surrender, her great compassion yet a detachment, most importantly, her greatest capacity to love.

In conclusion, considering all the disorders and their management mentioned above, it can be advocated that if the fetus and the pregnant woman are taken care of during each of the nine months, we can not only control all the possible disorders but can also help both mother and her child to live a healthy and happy life.

Reference:

1. Charaka Samhita: Charak Samhita of Agnivesh, Elaborate by Charak, redacted by Drdhabala   (vol.-1), Edited with  ”Vaidyamanorama”, Hindi Commentry Along with Special Deliberation etc. by Acharya Vidyadhar Shukla and Prof. Ravi Dutt Tripathi, Forward by Acharya Priy Vrata Sharma, Chaukhamba Sanskrit Pratishthan, Delhi, (2002).

2. Dutta D.C.: Text book of Obstetrics, 6th Edi., New Central Book Agency (P) LTD., Calcutta, (2004).

3. Tewari PV: Ayurveda Prasutitantra Evam Striroga, (Part 1) PrasutiTantra (Obstetrics), by Prof. (Km.) Premvati Tewari, Chaukhambha Orientalia, Varanasi (2003).

4. Tewari PV:  Kashyap Samhita, (1 Ed.), Chaukhambha Viswabharati Prakashan, Varanasi (1996).

5. Harita Samhita: Harit Samhita,”Hari” Hindi Commentry by Pandit HariharPrasad Tripathi, Chaukhambha Krishndas academy, Varanasi (2005).

6  Sushruta samhita: Susruta Samhita of Maharsi Susruta, Edited with Ayurveda-Tattva-Sandipika, Hindi Commentary, Scientific Analysis, Notes etc, by Kaviraja AmbikaDutta Shastri, A.M.S.(Part-1) Chaukhambha Sanskrit Sansthan, Varanasi, (2004).

7  Yogratnakar : Yogaratnakara with ”Vidyotini” Hindi Commentry by Vaidya Laksmipati Sastri, Edited by Bhisagratna Brahmasankar Sastri, Chaukhambha Prakashan, Varanasi (2008).

8. Kashyap samhita: The Kashyap samhita or (Vrddhajivakiya Tantra), by Vrddha Jivaka, Revised by Vatsya, With Sanskrit Introduction, By Nepal Rajaguru ”Pandit Hemaraja Sarma”, with The ”Vidyotini” Hindi Commentary and Hindi Translation of Sanskrit Introduction  by Ayurvedalankar, ”Sri Satyapala Bhisagacharya”, Chaukhambha Sanskrit Sansthan, Varanasi (2008).

9. Vaghbata: A. Astanga Hrdayam of Srimad Vagbhata, Edited with ”Nirmala” Hindi Commentary, along with special delibration etc. By Dr. Brahmanand Tripathi, Chaukhamba Sanskrit Pratishthan, Delhi (2007).

B. Astanga Samgraha with Hindi Commentary (Vol.1) by Kaviraj Atrideva Gupta Vidyalankar, Bhishagratna. Foreword by Rajvaidya Pandit Sri NandaKishor Sharma, Bhishagacarya, Chowkhambha Krishnadas Academy, Varanasi (2005).

There’s a term that young, single guys use for **** moms: M.I.L.F.  It’s an acronym for Mother I’d Like to #$%@.  Don’t be insulted; it’s the highest compliment a stupid man can pay you.  (And don’t be frightened.  It’s always muttered behind your back.  No man would ever be so bold as to tell you to your face.)  You can pretend to be shocked, appalled, and offended, but you’re not fooling anyone.  There will come a time when you’re feeling unattractive and loathsome — you’ll be wearing your fat pants for the tenth consecutive week, you’ll be covered in spit-up, and you’ll have likely gone weeks without so much as a nod from your husband.  One day, when you take the pains to doll yourself up and you catch an appreciative glance from a hot young buck, you’ll remember: “I’ve still got it.”  It’ll put a spring in your step.  And it’ll raise the bar for you to get it together on a more regular basis.

Not just in the looks department, though.  (A woman who overvalues her appearance is a bimbo — mother or not.)  You’ll be inspired to be a whole person again, and not just a mommy.  Remember what it was like before you became a mom?  When you had ideas, thoughts, and opinions about things other than your child?  Having outside interests or personal needs doesn’t make you a bad mom.  It makes you human.  Nurturing those needs and interests will make you a better mom.  If you’re feeling resentful or unfulfilled or bored, you’re of no use to your baby.  In fact, you **** for your baby.  She never asked you to become a single-minded, lame-ass bore.  So quit blaming her.  She’d prefer to have a happy mom with a rich, layered life.  She can survive without you for an hour a day, or for as many hours as you need to feet happy and whole.  Don’t use motherhood as an excuse to give up on your own life.  It’s an easy trap to fall into.  So be strong.

And be vigilant.  Don’t be a sucker for advertising anymore.  Read the labels of everything you buy.  If you’re going to put it in your mouth or on your skin, or in your baby’s mouth or on her skin, you better know exactly what it is.  No ifs, ands, or buts.  Use your own head and don’t believe or trust anyone.  Do your own research and make your own well-informed decisions.  You’re a big girl now.

And love yourself, big *** and all.  Mommies who love themselves make babies who love themselves.  Good health is the most important thing you can give your baby.  Confidence is the most important thing you can instill in your child.  And you can’t instill it in your kid while you’re busy knocking yourself.  Would you ever allow your daughter to think her self-worth is tied up in her body?  Would you adore and worship her any less if she were chubby?  So why do you deserve less than your daughter?  Be the type of woman you want her to be.  Or raise the kind of man you’d want a daughter to marry.  Do you want your son to choose a supermodel or a super girl?  One of them is fool’s gold.

Now just because looks are unimportant, that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t honor and celebrate yourself.  Buy cute clothes for your **** mommy body and rock your new curves.  Get over the, “I still need to lose X pounds” bullshit and just have fun.  Don’t put being happy and confident on hold until your scale reads a specific number.  Be happy and confident now!  It’s not an external thing.  It’s simply a choice.  And if you’d open your eyes, you’d recognize that there are few things more beautiful than confidence.  Confidence is at the pinnacle of beauty, along with generosity, gratitude, and love.

You’re a mother now.  It is an honor and a gift to give life.  Feel nothing but blessed by the miracle that has been bestowed upon you.  Bask in the glow.  And extend your love to not only your child, but to all children.  And in fact, embrace all moms, who are really no different than you.  While you’re at it, love those who are childless.  Hell, you might as well love everyone.  What greater purpose can you serve than to love everyone?  What greater lesson can you teach your child than to love everyone?  What greater way can you better the world than to love everyone in it?

Mahatma Gandhi said, “Be the change you wish to see in the world.”  If you can embody that, you won’t ever have to teach your child anything.  You can just be.

The above is an excerpt from the book Skinny ***** Bun in the Oven: A Gutsy Guide to Becoming One Hot and Healthy Mother!

by Rory Freedman and Kim Barnouin

Published by Running Press; September 2008; $14.95US/$16.00CAN; 978-0-7624-3105-2

Copyright © 2008 Rory Freedman and Kim Barnouin

Author Bio

Rory Freedman and Kim Barnouin started a movement when they wrote their best-selling manifesto, Skinny *****. Both a wake-up call and a kick in the ass, Skinny ***** exposed the horrors of the food industry while inspiring people to eat well and enjoy food.

Freedman, a former agent for Ford Models, has been studying nutrition for fifteen years. She has one uterus.

Barnouin, a former model, holds a Master of Science degree in Holistic Nutrition. She has one son, Jackson, whom she was pregnant with while researching this book.